Retro Review: I’m Not Dancin’ With No Wolves No Matter How High I Get


“After blowing it as a major league baseball pitcher Kenny Powers returns to his small Southern hometown, where he takes a gig as a substitute gym teacher at his old middle school.  There, he gets to see his former high school sweetheart, April, who is engaged to Terrence, the dimwitted principal.  This hilarious, Southern-fried series is produced by Will Ferrell and Adam McKay.” – Official Synopsis

If Billy Madison forgot all his hard earned life lessons, grew a mullet, became a professional baseball player, and then f’ed it all up and became a substitute gym teacher only to learn those lessons over again in hour long episodes you would have the spirit of Eastbound and Down.  That may not sound like a glittering review, but I actually really enjoyed the 6 episode season as Kenny Powers says everything I desperately would like to say to people, but with the added bonus of hick undertones.

Although there is a plot and fully developed characters, I don’t know if anyone is actually watching hoping Kenny gets his big break.  In the same vein as The Office, Eastbound‘s main character is so outrageously uncomfortable to watch, you can’t help but squirm while simultaneously falling into fits of laughter.  Essentially, Eastbound and Down is a showcase for McKay and Ferrell’s trademark comedy of using crude language in front of and with children, while having some of the best one liners in town.  If you’re like me and have the sense of humor of a 12 year old boy, you will be repeating lines for days after you finish an episode.

I’m happy to report Eastbound was picked up for a second season, as reviewing 6 episodes is really hard to do when you’re already worried about giving too much away.  If you need a laugh, but don’t want to get too absorbed into a series (a la Lost) Eastbound is for you.  Check out some quotes that were too inappropriate to post, but worth a netflix rental to hear/see in context.

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2 thoughts on “Retro Review: I’m Not Dancin’ With No Wolves No Matter How High I Get

  1. Junkie2 says:

    (When discussing the appropriate attire to wear to a barbecue)

    Kenny: What did I tell you? I said put something nice on, you look like a busted Daytona stripper in that $#!&.

    Tracy: “This is my evening wear”

    Kenny: “Tracy, I love you. But you got clothes like a f’ing dickhead. Now I know you’re not a natural beauty, but I think with the right clothes and the right look you could be very striking.”

    Tracy: “What do you know?”

    Kenny: “I know one of us has had their own personal stylist and the other shoplifts their shit from fashion bug, that’s what I know.”

  2. Junkie2 says:

    History lesson for you:

    Kenny: “you know the black plague started in birdbaths just like that…yup, Rats made sex to birds and created a whole new type of aids.

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